Valentines Day: The Morning After

written by Patty Sherry, founder of the inspirational blog Share Your Love Story

 

Its the day after the biggest day that is devoted to LOVE of the year. How was it for you? And how are you today?

 

Valentines Day, if you chose it to be so, can be one of the biggest days of SELF reflection:

Did you feel a ping because you weren’t in the kind of relationship you wanted or any relationship at all?

Did your man say the right words, do the right thing, enough, anything at all? Did you find yourself judging him, or comparing?

Did you find yourself feeling like nothing you did was right or enough?
Did you feel the energy of LOVE and connection? Did you feel nothing at all?

Valentines Day: love it or hate it. Or perhaps something in between? I believe in shades of grey, not just black or white.

I’m not ga-ga over Valentines Day, but I’m not bah-humbug about it either. I will admit that I have felt some of the pings though.

I am and probably always will be a romantic at heart. Some call me an open book; emotions bared across my sleeve. Vulnerable. It’s been a process, but I am easing into the comfort of this assesment. I’m easing into my own vulnerability. I don’t feel this to be a detriment, I feel it my strength. I’m more aware.

I found an old journal entry I had written a year ago, Feb 14, 2011, sparked by the energy of Valentines Day.

At the time I was sad and hurting; not in the kind of relationship that I wanted to be. Life seemed to be imploding and I felt pretty much alone in it. Valentines Day magnified it all.  Home alone that night, I allowed and accepted these feelings to surface. I allowed and accepted the tears and anger that came with them. It’s how I process  and move forward to open myself.

After I did this, here is an excerpt of what flowed in my journal one year ago….

Do you feel your own worth. Do you feel how loved you are? Do you feel how beautiful and desired you are? Yes, someone like you doesn’t come along very often.

Can you feel the excitement in your belly. Something is changing…..you are changing and there is a new air of excitement in the wind.

Yes, that excitement that you have been craving. That love you have been craving, that personal and intimate connection that yes….you have wanted to feel. It is all happening. At least you are opening more and more for it. Allow this wonderful stuff in. You are about to be happier than you have ever known.

I’ve come to know this type of writing to myself as my natural state. It’s a state I am in when all my crap does not get in the way. It’s the part of me that knows all is well. It’s the part of me that knows I’m ok. It’s the part of me that does not judge.
It comes out when I clear the crap. I’m sharing it with you because Valentines Day is the perfect opportunity for you to bring more awareness to yourself, to let the crap surface, and to clear it.

It’s so easy to make Valentines Day all about the love someone else is giving you or NOT giving you. I’m pretty sure that is why so many of us can get turned off by Valentines Day, because it becomes a way to judge and compare others rather than a day to feel love and connection.

But it doesn’t have to be. If it triggers something within you, let it. Learn from it. Open from it. Grow. Change.  I’m comfortable enough with my own vulnerability to share it. Valentines Day is simply a mirror for where I am. It shows me what I am willing to give or not give to myself. How loved am I? I am loved as much as I am willing to love myself.

So are you.

Happy post Valentines Day.

 

 

 

Patty Sherry is owns Arabella LLC a self empowerment coaching company located in Bergen County, New Jersey. She helps people deal with life issues and improve their relationships. For more info please visit her website www.ShareYourLoveStory.com and follow her on FB.

Category: Agencies